onelinersYesterday at 8:59 amJesus fed 5,000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread. That’s not a miracle. That’s tapas.
oneliners1 Feb at 9:00 amI swear to drunk I’m not God, but seriously, stay in drugs, eat school, and don’t do vegetables.
oneliners28 Jan at 1:59 amWhat do Jesus and the square root of negative one have in common? They’re both imaginary.
oneliners25 Jan at 8:00 amAnd the Lord said unto John, “come forth and receive eternal life.” But John came fifth and won a toaster.
oneliners5 Jan at 9:58 amSee, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time.
oneliners3 Jan at 1:58 pmDid you hear about the girl who fell asleep on the Synagogue steps? She woke up with a heavy dew on her.