oneliners1 Feb at 3:59 amI hate that feeling after surgery when you’re not sure if you’re awake or asleep or if you operated on the right patient.
oneliners28 Jan at 9:58 pmI hate people who use big words just to make themselves look perspicacious.
oneliners24 Jan at 12:59 amI’m experiencing heavy call volumes. Please hang up and never call me again.
oneliners21 Jan at 3:59 amMy therapist told me that a great way to let go of your anger is to write letters to people you hate and then burn them. I did that and I feel much better but I’m wondering… do I keep the letters?
oneliners15 Jan at 5:59 pmThe therapist asked my wife why she wanted to end our marriage. She said she hated all the constant Star Wars puns. I look at the therapist and said, “Divorce is strong with this one!”
oneliners9 Jan at 10:00 amI have never understood why women love cats. Cats are independent, they don’t listen, they don’t come in when you call, they like to stay out all night, and when they’re home they like to be left alone and sleep. In other words, every quality that women hate in a man, they love in a cat.
oneliners5 Jan at 3:58 pmDon’t hate me because I’m beautiful. Hate me because your boyfriend thinks so.
oneliners5 Dec 2022I hate when a couple argues in public but I missed the start and don’t know whose side I’m on.
