oneliners5 Feb at 11:00 pmI’m guessing I’m not married because I’d take a bullet for a grilled cheese before I’d take one for a girl.
oneliners3 Feb at 3:59 amAny married man should forget his mistakes, there’s no use in two people remembering the same thing.
oneliners1 Feb at 1:58 amThe best part of being married on Valentine’s Day is having all your expectations fulfilled. Because you have no expectations.
oneliners29 Jan at 1:59 amThe girl at the bar: “You’re funny.” I bring her over to meet my wife: “Tell her what you said.”
oneliners28 Jan at 2:59 amThe value of money in a relationship: the 10 bucks that the wife and the tax inspection don’t know about are worth more than the 100 that both know about.
